Posted by I’ve never been a gambler. Ever since hearing the Kenny Rodgers song as a kid, I never got over the image of a gambler as a cigarette bum with the audacity to drink your last swallow of whiskey. I didn’t know much, but I knew enough that I didn’t want to grow up like that guy. Nowadays the only gambling I partake in is when I pay $15 for a movie ticket at the theatres. Lately it feels like the odds of paying to watch a Hollywood Suckfest are a depressing 10-1.
So while I’ve never stepped foot into a casino, participated in sports betting, or placed my kid’s college fund on a horse, I understand the concept of betting the odds. The only way to win HUGE is when the odds are stacked disgustingly against you. This is probably why I don’t gamble. But I’m tired of looking like a deer in headlights whenever people talk about “betting the spread.” Gamblers on television, in movies, and in real life talk about getting raped by the spread, and it’s time I knew what the hell they were talking about, as opposed to imagining them getting sodomized by a jar of Cheese Whiz.
So I did some research into this whole spread betting thing, (and by research I mean I Googled it), and I’m presenting here spread betting as I understand it: a guide so basic that a 4-year-old can understand it, which may come in handy one day when mommy or daddy lose the house during a game of poker.
The Godfather of Spread
Born in 1903, Charles K. McNeil’s life revolved around numbers, beginning his career as a math teacher at a prep school in Connecticut. At the outset of the 1930s he went on to become a securities analyst for a bank in Chicago, where he also discovered sports betting at baseball games. He developed such a keen eye for winning teams that he was able to make a living off his predictions in less than ten years, when he would also finance his own bookmaking operation. Bored with simply betting on the odds, McNeil decided to spice things up by inventing a new way for bettors to gamble. Not only could they bet on who would win, but by how much. Now people had the chance to still win big, even if they bet on the hugely favored team. The point spread is born.
How the point spread works
Let’s pretend the L.A. Lakers are going head to head with the Cleveland Cavs. Lebron James is out with swollen lymph nodes, so the bookmakers are predicting a Laker victory with a spread of 22 points. If you still think the Cavs can pull it off and you bet on the underdog, you’ll win money if:
A) They blow past the Laker’s, wiping that smug grin off Kobe’s face, or…
B) They lose by less than 22 points, in which case they “win against the spread,” and Kobe gets to keep his grin.
But you’ll lose money if the Lakers “cover the spread” and win by more than 22 points.
Now to avoid something called a “push,” whereby the Lakers win by exactly the amount as the spread and no one wins, bookmakers create spreads with half-points to ensure commissions.
Over/Unders
Another popular method for sports betting is betting on whether the total score from both teams is over or under the amount set by the bookmakers. So if you’re like me and you have no idea which NBA, MLB, KFC, or NFL picks to make, you can just wander in without a clue, see the number 47, slap your wad of cash down boldly declaring “Higher!”
